Yes, just when you thought (and, in many cases, hoped) they were gone for good, Scott Baio, Steve Guttenberg, Mark Linn Baker, Melanie Griffith and Don Johnson are all popping up on television this season. Is this a conspiracy? Was there really someone at the UPN who charged into a meeting and proclaimed "You know what this season needs? Guttenberg!"?
I don't know the reason, but they're back, for better or for worse. And, oddly, I'm excited about some of them. Ok, I'm not exactly jonesing to see "Perfect Strangers"-straight man Baker star with the Griffith on the painful WB sitcom "Twins," but Johnson's show "Just Legal," is getting good buzz. And Baio is turning up on "Arrested Development," one of the wittiest shows on television. Granted, he pales next to former "AD" guest star Liza Minnelli (and Charlize Theron, who will also guest this year) but it's almost impossible for someone to not be funny on this show.
And Guttenberg? Well, he's guesting on my cherished "Veronica Mars." He better not screw it up.
In the spirit of this nostalgic casting, I've prepared my own list of 80s stars I'd like to see resurface, and the TV shows that I think would make the best fit with them. Casting directors, if you see my suggestions and decide to take them as your own, just be sure to give me credit. And a nice check.
1. Kirk Cameron: Ok, so the artist formerly known as Mike Seaver has become born-again post "Growing Pains." So wouldn't it be funny if Mr. "Left Behind" guest starred on "Desperate Housewives" as a naughty preacher? Perhaps one who starts a scandalous affair with the newly widowed Bree?
2. Joan Collins: Come on -- ever since "The O.C." began its run, you've hoped that Alexis Carrington herself would show up and teach these teeny-boppers what real a prime-time soap star looks like. And what better role for her than as a long-lost relative to Julie Cooper, the show's answer to Collins in her "Dynasty" heyday? By my count, it would be only moments before the two were wrestling together in one of Orange County's many swimming pools. Heaven.
3. Jennifer Grey: The "Dirty Dancing" star had her career famously derailed after a nosejob that rendered her virtually unrecognizable. So why not have her on "Nip/Tuck" as ... a movie star whose plastic surgery ruined her career by rendering her virtually unrecognizable? It's art imitating life -- and fixing its mistakes.
4. Justine Bateman: There actually had been talk that the former Mallory Keaton would guest star on "Arrested Development" as love interest to real life bro Jason Bateman. The idea was sick and deranged. I'm still upset that it never happened.
5. Molly Ringwald: Hmm. I don't know. Maybe she could be a guest voice on "The Simpsons." Or do a reunion with her "Pretty in Pink" co-star Jon Cryer on "Two and a Half Men." Whatever. I just miss Molly. Would someone please give her a job?