Oh sure, I’ve caught moments – like the first season finale, when that angry trucker lady told that goggle-eyed hippie girl she wouldn’t give her a glass of water if she were dying of thirst.
But generally, I’ve managed to avoid it. I have no grudge against it. Obviously, it has an appeal if it’s managed to last for 12 seasons.
It is simply not my cup of tea. I don’t really care for reality shows. Real life is filled with enough backstabbing and pointless bickering. TV is, by definition, escapism. I don’t want more of the same.
Yet, when I had the chance to sit in on a conference call with the show’s host, Jeff Probst, I took it. I mean, it is one of the most popular shows on television.
If that many people watch it, surely they’ll want to read about it. So, out of loyalty to you, the reader, I participated.
I admit I was a little uncomfortable sitting in on the call. I really couldn’t think of a good question for Probst. Pretty much my plan of attack was just to yell: “Say ‘The tribe has spoken! Say ‘The tribe has spoken!’� until he threw me off the call. But I didn’t even get a chance to do that.
For those who don’t know how these calls work, here’s a brief description.
First, you get on the line with the interviewee and a bunch of other reporters. Then, you usually have to press some combination of buttons, to indicate that you want to ask him or her a question. Then, whoever is moderating the call calls on the reporters in order of their dial-in.
So I dialed in and waited.
Obviously, I wasn’t quick enough on the trigger because, after 45 minutes, I still hadn’t been called on. By this time, all the really good questions had been asked and answered.
Here’s an example. The very first reporter called on asked Probst his feelings on the recent tax evasion conviction of first-season winner Richard Hatch.
That was the first question. Clearly, there was nowhere to go but down.
Even the marginally good questions, like whether Probst likes the similarly-themed "Lost," were asked fairly early in the game.
So there I was, riding the caboose, just waiting to be called on. But after 45 minutes, I couldn’t wait anymore. At this time, I knew pretty much everything I needed to know about Probst and the show, and had to move on to my next assignment.
A reporter can’t live on Probst alone.
So, I hung up. I can only imagine that, moments after I departed, my name was called. That’s usually how these things work for me.
But that’s all right. I can hear Probst say “The tribe is spoken� anytime. All I have to do is watch his show.
Yeah, that’s not gonna happen.
For those who care: Here are some of the more memorable quotes from Probst's conference call that didn't make it into today's story in the Connecticut Post.
On his TV tastes: Probst admitted that he isn't a big fan of that other show about castaways stranded in an exotic locale. He said he's watched ABC's hit drama "Lost," but can't get into it. “My closest friends can’t believe it,� he said.
And his “Lost� aversion isn’t because the show is on a competing network, Probst said. In fact, he’s a big fan of another reality show on a different network. “I love ‘American Idol,’� he confessed. “I don’t know why.�
On the new cast: Probst had nothing but nice things to say about this season's group of castaways. In fact, he hinted that at least two of the new faces may end up among fans' all-time favorites. "This group of people was such a breath of fresh air," he said.
On the longevity of "Survivor": Probst said there's a reason "Survivor" has thrived, while many reality shows have gone sour -- it's just good television, reality or otherwise. "I don't even think people who are fans of 'Survivor' think of as reality any more. They think of it as 'Survivor.'"